Complete Contrast !!

Found two different day cares in two different localities. These places were refered and praised by Anupam's collegues and suit us somewhat (we will need to shift house , for one),so are top in the list.But they turned out complete contrast. D1 and D2 is what I will refer them , for ease of writing.

D1 is a new place , in a posh locality , opened by a US returned fairly young female.The place is big , clean and carpeted,good cots and matresses, equipped with latest toys , educated teachers (which will do ALL) , plasama TV and CC cameras. They will give food , engage them in lot of activities and discipline them to a schedule.She will use diapers , but assures that she will train them for potty.

D2 on the other hand is a homely place , run by a old Tamilian lady , called Paty(Granny) by the kids. The place is comparitively smaller , non-carpeted , no fancy toys , no matresses and cots but simple floor mats, no teachers but aayas, no TV and no camera.We have to pack and keep the food with them , which will be heated and served. Kids will be allowed to live as they want , no discipline , but she will not use diapers and train them for potty.

NOW..why the confusion !! Let us make a list of Pros and Cons :

D1 - Pros

1. Commodious and Clean
2. Good Cots and Matresses
3. Freshly cooked Food
4. Camera , so that we can see baby from our offices.
5. Lot of activities with all kinds of toys.

D2 - Pros

1. The Old Lady is well experienced ,not only being old , running the plae from 2 years.
2. Baby will get a homely environment.
3. No Diapers , so faster potty training
4. Baby's routine and food will not be changed much , just that he will need to get adjusted to new place.
5. ***specific to me*** No need to shift house.

D1 - Cons

1. The owner is not experienced for running a day care and sounded too theoritical.
2. Felt like she was insisting too too much on schedule and I am not sure that kids can be programmed to a schedule so well (includes food and sleep timings) and how good is that for their normal physical and more importantly physcological growth.
3. Diapers , why will anyone bother for potty training when baby is in diaper.
4. TV, who wants little kids hooked to TV.
5. ***specific to me*** Will need to shift house.

D2 - Cons

1. No planned activities. Baby will just spend time as he/she wants. So not sure how well will he learn new things and if Just sleeping , eating and playing with other kids is good enough.
2. Hygine and cleaniness, It was a clean place but not spot less.


I plan to put Aryan to day care when he will be 11 months old.Both the places have been highly praised by collegues and so they are highly prefered among others. But how do I decide among the two ?

Pool Time !!

This Sunday Aryan had loads of fun in his small pool. Here is a glimpse..

If you can give your son or daughter only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.

8 things about me...

Hmm.. SM has Tagged me ..So I need to say 8 things about me thats not known to you..
Fun Game !!

1. I wanted to be doctor since childhood and I still want too.. :D Though I know this will always remain a dream.
2. I am too too short tempered , which is the reason of all my problems in life.
3. I love soft music , Jagit singh is my favourite.
4. Sometimes I like movies which turn out to be real flops.. like in my early teens I liked movies called "Dil Ka Kya Kasoor" and "Deewana"..:D
5. I would love to dress up like Cindrella once in my life.
6. I always wanted to sing and dance well , but I never could.
7. I was soooooo punchual till college that my friends used to hate me for that. I would yell at them if they were late by 5 mins and they would always be.. :) Once I made them all wait for 45 mins in a restaurant to give them a lession. Now I can not manage to be that that punchual though I still want to.
8. I believe that my intution never drives me wrong , and I sometimes develop strong likes and dislikes based on that , but I guess thats not justified behaviour.

Hey ...I did it ..in just 5 mins !! And I really enjoyed doing this.
Now I tag.. Do I write, Agelessbonding and Karmickids.
Go check them out !

The much awaited milestone !

"Finally !!" is what was on my mind when he moved ahead. Aryan(Aru) was trying to crawl since long and every single day my husband would estimate about in how many days will he be able to crawl and my MIL and I would thumbs up to what he says.

But all in vain. None of the estimates worked and he could only try and try and try.I lost hopes for his crawling and thought he will probably walk directly as I did.Sometimes when people asked me , "Did he crawl?" , I would joke that Aru has decided to swim and fly ..and crawling is not something he wants. Quite recently though , just about a week back , he started moving in reverse gear ,in sitting postion itself.

Now that he started crawling ..we have started estimating the time for his walking. I know he will prove us wrong again.I think better we should enjoy looking at him , crawling on his tummy using his hands and mastering the skill. And let him enjoy the same too for quite some time :-)

Today I know ,one fine day he will decide to walk too and its better to give him, his own time.

How do they know LOVE !!

Sunday evening at about 4 PM , my SIL and her family returned home after spending 5 days vacation with us. Soon after they left , Aryan slept.He was too tired after having loads of fun with the kids and slept for about 4 hours.

When he woke up , he realized that his Bua , Phupha ji and the two bro's (9 and 5 years old) are not yet back. He realized that probably they are gone.He realized that it was another usual evening for others, with everyone watching TV and chatting. He became very cranky and clinged to me hard and wanted all our attention. We switched off the TV and did all what we could to make him happy. But he won't let go. He wanted everyone else to just in front of him , till he slept that night.Probably he felt lonely or insecure.

It was so amazing to realize that a 10 months old baby could understand love and attention so well.When his 9 year old bro gave a peck on his cheek , he smiled back and he called me(in his own language ,the typical 'ayeee') to tell the same. He looked as if he felt blessed. When my SIL holded him in her arms , he rubbed his cheeks to hers to show his love.These were the people he has not met before , atleast not in recent past. Now they are gone and he misses them.

Love, for sure needs no words.

Women on Top

In one of my initial post , I debated on the fact that women have equal brains as men do , though they might develop differently. In continuation with that , here is some more , to give a thought.

A leading global media and entertainment company , recently conducted a study and found that they have 50 % of women population among their total employees around the world.But what was more striking to them was that the men : women ratio was significantly low at the top level. They did a study on the "Why" and conducted discussions and meeting with the women on top in different companies.

After which they conducted an only women leadership program , and some of the aspiring women from their organization were invited to attend the same from around the world. One of my collegues (at a senior level) got the chance to attend the same and here is what she shared.

Negotiate : We, the women are poor at negotiating for ourselves. While negotiating for a promotion or a hike,we give up far more easily than men , probably because we have different priorties and for a majority of us job is secondary.

Here are some tips while you negotiate.A) Try not to be defensive. The other guy would always want you to get defensive. But try not to be. Speak less and let the other person talk more. When you feel the need to be defensive , ask a question.Ask more questions and let him find answers to the questions(which he is not prepared to answer).B)Do not get flattered. They will try to faltter you telling you that you did a great job and no one can do it better. (So you basically continue doing the same).C)Tell them their gain. How do they benifit from you. D) If you cannot get through , negotiate to find a midway , where both are benifited.E) Know your market value and negotiate on that. Tell them I want to stay with you and this is what I will get if I go elsewhere.

Heads Up : Women normally follow a "Heads down approach". This also comes from their basic nature. A woman manager would utlize most of her time and energy at getting the best from her team. we should get more balanced and look straight. Guys spend quality time to sell themselves.They know what they have done and what is the impact , while women will just keep doing the due , thinking it as a part of their job.So strike a balance and invest time in selling yourself.

Network Well : Network yourself well. There are a few areas to that. List down the people who a)Support you b)Sponser you.Mind that, your competitors cannot be your sponsors.

Another known reason and I personally feel the most important reason is most women choose to take a break to nurture their families and they head start after a long gap. So the guys are far ahead till that time. So even if you think you are spending too much on getting a support system for your kids and not able to earn anything from your work , its worth it in longer run.

Aah ! Those Silky Hair !!

"Gone are the times when I would brush my hand in HIS silky soft Hair !!." This is the statement my husband uses as he misses Aryan's Hair.
Now , as new hair are budding over his head , even he himself does not want to touch his head. I often brush his hand over his head and he would quickly drag it away ..:)

Our Little Darling's Little Confusions :)

Our bed is in a corner of the room.To ensure Aryan's safety atleast from two sides , we make him sleep ,next to the wall.
So the only choice he has is to cuddle with me me before he sleeps. Yesterday ,we thought of making him sleep in the center (between his mumma and papa).Though there was no reason ,just like that.
Now my little sweetheart was so confused to choose between mumma and papa. He did not want to offend either. So he was shuttling between us.He would face and cuddle with mumma for 2 seconds and then with papa for 2 seconds.
Both of us felt so blessed that moment.Our 10 months baby was showing us how much he loves both of us and how he is unable to decide his preference. This shuttling went on for 10 minutes , when I finally decided that , he has to be next to his wall , if he has to sleep :-)

Finding a Day Care ????

The Process is going on and on and on...We do not belong to Bangalore but then nobody does really belong to a Metro. Whats more problemtic is , we hardly have company of people of our age group. So here I am searching for a day care for my little one even before he was born.
But I still stand no where.Now he is about 10 months old and in another 2 months we have to put him in a daycare. If only anyone could tell me , where do I lack effort :

1. I asked all friends and relatives in Bangalore , with and without kids.
2. I asked all of collegues,even the bachelors.
3. I read all the classified , message boards and sources available on internet.
4. I posted ads whereever possible.
5. I called Just dial several times.
6. I called all preschools to ask if by any chance they run a day care too.
7. I visited day cares in various localities , so that if any one suits my needs , I may even shift my house.

But nothing worked till date. Could all the women out there tell me ..HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO WORK !!!!!!

Good mothering makes you a good mother

I Read the following here :After I had kids I realized that it doesn’t matter if you stay home, if you work full or part time, if your kids are homeschooled, public-schooled, in daycare, or not. Those are all variables. They are not reliable indicators of a good upbringing.

The best indicator is how you parent.

Spending all day with your kids, staying home, that doesn’t make you a good mother. Practicing good mothering makes you a good mother

Managing time for ME ..Just ME !!

Yesterday I read a post on someone's blog titled "Do Clothes Make the Mom? By Stacy Canzonieri". Though I lost the link to the post , it made me wonder so many different things.

I am a mom of a 10 months baby and if I look at myself ,yes I have not been to parlour for last 3 months , mind it not even for eyebrows. But should I blame that to my baby ..I guess no. If you dress up nicely or not , depends on your interest and also how well you can manage time.Before being a mom too , sometimes I was lazy to go to parlour and visited only when I could no longer look at my own face :D

I guess the problem with me is something else.When life becomes monotonous , I loose interest in everything. Everything as in everything..be it getting ready or whatever.Faced the smiliar situation in pregnancy too.So what do I do ..sometimes I did nothing and waited for things to change. But perhaps now I cannot do the same.As I know life is not going to change in near future. My job is monotonous , but I have decided to stick here for its easy going and I dont have to spend weekends and evenings at work and I can get ample time for my little one. At home , ofcourse things will be same , getting ready , coming to office , back home , play with my son ,take care of him and then off to bed.Ofcourse I enjoy spending time with my family in evenings and thats the best part of my day.So how should I cope up with my monotonous schedule and find something that can make me happier.

One, I think, I will have to learn to manage my time better so that I can find time to do something more than the routine work and keep myself alive.

Two, When I was pregnant I discovered that I love interacting with strangers with similiar interest. So I found so many pregnant friends and they are still with me.Reading mails from them is an important and refreshing part of my day.

Three, I started writing this blog.I realized that blogging (reading and writing) is a great way to find people of same interest , to align one's thought,to scratch the rusting brain and to excrete negative energy. So here I am ..finding time out of such a busy schedule for doing something I like. Perhaps I can develop this hobby for better. Or perhaps one day I will find this also monotonous. Thats the reason I decided not to write everyday , but only when I feel a need. But I do spend some time reading blogs , almost everyday.

Four , I found that retail therapy works for me. Going out on weekends ,even if thats for buying veggies from super market makes me feel good. So I guess , next I should refresh my driving skills so that I am not dependent on anyone for some retail therapy .. :D Just me and my little one will roam around the town.

What more , I have thought of making a scrapbook for my baby's first year and gift it to him sometime later, when he is grown up enough, to understand it. Don't really know , if I will live upto it.

And yes , I plan to go to parlour this weekend ! But lets see .."If I find Time" .. :-P

Aryan's Mundan at Tirupati

This weekend we went to tirupati for Aryan's Mundan.We includes both of us and Anupam's parents.When we planned for the trip I was too apprehensive about it because it was 6-7 hours journey and long queue before darshan.We were told that people pour like anything over there. Aryan is small and still on bottle feed.I was not sure how will we manage all.I agreed because everyone insisted.

So we started our journey at 6.15 am on Saturday in our dear car. Just 4 kms from home we realized that we have forgotten something at home and had to drive back.So effectively we started at 7 am.The road was too good but there was some traffic till Kolar. We stopped at Woody's in Kolar for breakfast.It was a okay kind of place with south indian cusine. Food was not too great though but we did not expect better.

After breakfast we resumed our journey. There was too little traffic after Kolar. I and my MIL utilized our time by clicking the rocks on the way and ofcourse playing with our cutiepie, as my husband drove the car along with chatting with his Father.

We reached Tirupati at 11.30 Am which was earlier than what we expected. We were told by some experienced experts in our offices that we will get some wrist bands at Garuda dwar after showing our tickets which will serve as tickets for us further.We could not find the Garuda dwar initially and reached the TTD office. The people there were too ignorant about the wrist bands and they could not understand what we were talking.Finally we were told that they cannot help us with anything and we should go to Garuda dwar. When we reached Garuda dwar , we were sent to a checkpost where the security guard was too lazy to do any checking and we were directed to the way to Tirumala (without any wrist bands ).

The way to Tirumala was very well maintained.Road was good , one way ,well maintained and tidy beyond expectations. It was a smooth ride to Tirumala. In Tirumala we spoke to some policeman (we had a reference for him). The guy sent a constable with us who was supposed to help us find a stay, escort us till we get darshan and help us get the same.

That guy named Naryana took us to Mini Kalyankatta , the place for Mundan.We were told that as the name suggests this is Mini venue for Mundan and the actual Venue is BIG and has 2 hours queue.Aryan was placed in his dadu's lap for mundan. His dadu holded him tight as the blade moved over his head and he cried his heart out. He was moving a lot and so I helped to hold him tight. His crying was making me shaky ,never heard him crying like that and for a moment I decided to cancel his mundan , leaving him half bald :) Well, that was a momentary thought though and mundan was soon completed.The baby was so scared after the event that he clinged to me hard and sobbed for sometime.

After that we went over to find a stay and we got a small room temporarily. The guest house owner promised to get us better rooms or atleast another room after the darshan. Aryan was given bath and we all got ready for the darshan after having some bread and butter for lunch.Naryana was smart enough to break all rules and we were in queue soon. He said that the queue from here will just take 45 mins to temple instead of 6-8 hours (if we had followed the rules). He was right and we could get the darshan within an hour. Standing in front of idol was a great feeling and we all felt a cool breeze.

Aryan was in happy mood by now and had forgotten about the mundan and has had a nap in anupam's lap.While getting out from the temple , he took the liberty of feeling the head of another bald child who walking next to anupam.The child was scared and then amused as Aryan moved his hand over the child's head twice.

So we were done with the event in 1.5 hours and were back to our guest house (after saying good bye to Mr. Narayana), where we could just get another room of same kinds. The room was not bad though and since it was cool in Tirumala , we did not need AC. All of us slept over for about an hour. After that we went out to a local handicraft shop which was very much like Cauvery Emporium in Bangalore and bought sovenier for the family members. Then began the struggle to get a place in a restraurant to have some dinner. The restraurant , WoodSide , was too crowded and food was real spicy. After dinner we returned to guest house and slept over till 6.00 am next morning.

Sunday we got ready , had good south indian breakfast at Mayura(finally I say good .. :) ) and went for some more sightseeing. We could not find much except some temples with long queues. None of us felt like standing in queue and we decided to start our journey to Bangalore.

Soon we reached Tirupati but forgot the way to Highway and roamed around the town asking for directions.It was tough to find the way as we did not know local language and they did not know English and Hindi.On the way back we stopped over at several 2-3 places to click snaps and buy some clay items. We ate a fruit which looked like Brinjal (and tasted like Litchi which is not sweet). Could not get the name of the fruit though. Clicked some snaps of the fruit's tree also. We had our lunch at Reliance A1 plaza and touched Bangalore at 4.00 pm

As a whole it was a short but memorable trip.

Different Moods !!